June 1st 2008. In two months time I am gonna be old. There is no escaping this. Come August 28 and I am gonna be 25. 25..Wow, 25..I am gonna be twenty five.The old age has begun to set in. I can feel it. My cells have begun dying. Dont ask me how I know it, I just know it. I am more in touch with my ‘inner self’ than you are. So I know when my cells die. In another 25 years, I am gonna be 50. That is certified old age. I might as well roll over and die. I dont belong to Youngistan anymore. Sometime later I am gonna wake up and realise that its my 50th birthday already. Time flies. The first 25 years just flew past. I’m figuring the next 25 will too.
Bah!! Thats enough misery for today! I think I will make a nice old woman. No wait, I dont wanna be so nice. I wanna be a less nice old woman. That way, I get to be old and nice but in a lesser degree. Ya, thats what I wanna be. I wanna be a LESS NICE OLD WOMAN. I like it. Im so proud of having coming up with that thought. Oh wait, isn’t an LESS OLD NICE WOMAN better than an LESS NICE OLD WOMAN? Aah!! Decisions..decisions..I tell you, my life is so full of decisions which I just cant seem to make.
I wish I could appoint someone, like a personal assistant to make my decisions for me, so that I dont have to be burdened with them. Hang on, I dont think that is such a brilliant idea. What if my PA is a malicious old bitch? What if she decides to send herself on a world tour with my hard earned money? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!That would be tragic. Ha!! but the joke’s on her. I dont have any hard earned money. You loser malicious old bitch, you thought you could make off with my money. Live a life of luxury. Ha! Ha! Ha! But you cant cause I dont have any money.
You know, the last line didn’t make me feel as good as it was supposed to.
I don’t think June is going to be such a great month. For one, it marks the onset of my old age. (Do I need a bigger reason to hate June?) Besides, its gonna rain. Now, I don’t have anything against rain. In fact its fun, once in a while, but the rains in Kerala are different. They are incessant and incredibly wet and dirty and puddly (thats right, even a drizzle leaves a puddle. I haven’t seen this in any other part of the world. This puddle phenomenon is exclusive to Kerala. You think its got anything to do with the fact that Kerala is a communist state? The ever present underlying need to form unions? Ya, it must be that. Think about it. One small drizzle and there are tons of puddles all around. And they are persistent too. They stick around like forever. Definitely a communist trait. Remind me to check with my Bengali friends. I might have just unravelled a mystery here. Ooooo..This is so exciting. I have never unravelled a mystery in my life before. Yay! Perhaps June is not so bad after all 
Well, thats one up for June. Good on ya month! Having said that, I hate it for the humidity it brings. The rains, the heat, the humidity. We are a sticky bunch of people, us Mallus, come June.
And most importantly, I hate June, cause I have been tricked into dieting this month. Well you see, a relative had come visiting and he bought along with him a huge packet of Twix to give it to the “kids”. Now since I am the youngest in my family, I figured he was referring to me with the term “kids” and hence I ate the ENTIRE PACKET, almost by myself. I spared a few for the others, I ain’t that selfish a pig! and now I feel bloated and guilty and my conscience has tricked me into making up for the binging spree and I have to diet. Have you noticed that there is a DIE in a DIET?
Bah! I have to go now. All this diet talk is depressing me. Any more depression and I might have to find solace in a bar of chocolate and that definitely wouldn’t be an auspicious start to my month of dieting. Now would it?
PS:
Random Thought: I cant decided whom I should support in the IPL finals..I love both the teams!! Aah!! decisions again!
Random Song: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he!
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
If nautical nonsense be something you wish…
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish!
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
I cant get it outta my head. Lalaalalalalallaalaaa!!! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!
Random Smell: The smell of freshly turned earth reminds me of Elephant Dung!!
Err.. Nini.. is this really you?
Agrees with Vallath.
Random Revelation: There are puddles, pudchutes, pudding and poda in bengal too. I made up the poda. No one knows what it means, but it sounds like anglicized farting here.
“dekho dekho, the boy paada”